Tom Selleck, Jr., 13 months, left this world for Robin Masters’ Heavenly Estate on December 12, 2005. Born November 11, 2004, Tom, Jr. was one of the first Blobbies, Jr. to be made and will always hold a special place in our hearts. Now, our “Quigley Up Above” can partake of infinite jelly donuts at the King Kamehameha Club in the sky. He is survived by Mr. Man, Jr., Loaf, and the Smelnors. However, he will not be alone in the sweet hereafter. Tom will be joining the gangrenous career of his “Three Men and a Little Lady” co-star, Steve Guttenberg, in the graveyard of the stars. With many tears and a tip of the Detroit Tigers cap we bid adieu to Tom Selleck, Jr. - Blobby pioneer.
Services will be held Wednesday, December 14, at the Bittles and Hurt funeral home on Main street in Newbraska. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made to the Foundation for Understuffed Blobbies, Jr. (FUB, Jr.).
The police force, headed by Urban Defender, is investigating the circumstances surrounding Mr. Selleck, Jr.’s death. Any information regarding the whereabouts of Black Bon Eye, who is wanted for questioning, may be directed to the Urban Defender’s office.
You'll never catch me! NEVAH!
With respect, it is clear to me that all clues lead to the unavoidable conclusion that this is a cover-up and a frame-up. If you put the first letters of the last two sentences of the article together, you get "AT," and then the very next (backwards) word is "FUB." The numerical equivalent of FUB is 29, clearly an address. In the next (prior) paragraph, the words "Detroit" and "Guttenberg" are conspicuously prominent. This must mean that either Tom is hiding AT 29 DETROIT street in a Bible store or printing press, or that Steve Guttenberg is holding Tom for a $29.00 ransom. I will leave it to the authorities to follow up on these clues.
As for Black Bon Eye, I once met him at a crossword puzzle convention, and he seems perfectly orderly and cognizant of the intricacies of language. Clearly such a man could have nothing to do with a murder or a conspiracy. We should consider who would want to frame him. . . and why.
Welcome to the Newbraska Picayune - the newspaper serving the greater Newbraska area. Here you'll find the latest news from the Blobby Farm, DIY projects, movie reviews, Blobituaries, and so on. Read up and come back often. Thanks for picking up a copy.
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Oct 14 | Plush You 2: Report from Seattle
Oct 11 | Blobbies Attend Abolish Columbus Day March
Oct 2 | Dear Lyssa of the Fringe,
Oct 1 | Mr. Man, Jr. in “Danse Russe”
Aug 17 | Blobby Farm Mentioned on Craft: Blog
Jul 13 | Blobby Farm on Mania TV
Jul 9 | New Wallpaper and Flickr Buddy Icons
Jul 3 | Morphe II
Jun 23 | Blobby Farm at Mahar Dry Goods
Apr 19 | Blobbies, Jr. Price Hike